Anger in the Bible: Gleaning Wisdom for Dealing with a Complicated Emotion

Many experiences are common to all people. Under certain circumstances and conditions, we cry, laugh, love, and feel loved, and we feel angry. These experiences won’t all look the same, and we might not describe them in the same way, but they are common to the human condition. Anger is a common emotion that comes up again and again in our daily experiences, so it’s no wonder the Bible addresses it.

We can feel angry because an electronic device isn’t doing what it’s supposed to, or because a loved one doesn’t seem to be hearing us, or because someone endangered our loved one, or because a colleague took sole credit on a joint project, or because a total stranger cut you off in traffic or insulted your favorite sports team, and many other reasons. The ubiquity of such situations makes it imperative to handle anger well.

Anger in the Bible

Anger shows up quite early in the story of the Bible. Cain is angry at his brother Abel because the Lord accepted Abel’s offering but doesn’t look with favor on Cain’s. We read, “So Cain was very angry, and his face was downcast” (Genesis 4:5, NIV). The Lord talks with Cain about this, saying,

Why are you angry? Why is your face downcast? If you do what is right, will you not be accepted? But if you do not do what is right, sin is crouching at your door; it desires to have you, but you must rule over it – Genesis 4:6-7, NIV

It’s up to Cain what he decides to do with this anger. Sin wants to master him, using his anger, but Cain can master it. The choice Cain made is infamous – he lured his brother to a field and decided to kill him, the first murder in history. The story continues in much the same way across generations, though there are other instances in which people master themselves and resist falling into sin on account of their anger.

There’s an important distinction that the Bible makes between anger and sin. Just because you’re feeling angry doesn’t necessarily mean you’re falling foul of the Lord’s standards for His creation. That’s one reason why Paul writes, “‘In your anger do not sin’: Do not let the sun go down while you are still angry, and do not give the devil a foothold” (Ephesians 4:26-27, NIV).

That thought does need to be balanced against what Jesus says. In the Sermon on the Mount, Jesus said, “…I tell you that anyone who is angry with a brother or sister will be subject to judgment” (Matthew 5:22, NIV). Jesus is pinpointing the fact that the act of murder doesn’t start when you physically attack someone, but it’s in one’s words, heart, and mindset that the issue is rooted.

Jesus is highlighting how this natural emotion harbors potential for sin, and the story of the Bible bears that out. There is such a thing as righteous anger, like what Jesus displayed in response to the money changers desecrating the temple (John 2:13-17), or the religious leaders’ callous disregard for others or the truth (Mark 3:1-5). However, human anger “does not produce the righteousness that God desires” (James 1:20, NIV).

Our anger, even when it is righteous, can be commingled with other motives, and sometimes even righteous anger can be channeled into unrighteous actions. Jesus’ actions, and the Lord throughout Scripture, acts assertively and expresses His anger, but these actions are always measured and motivated by a desire to uphold what is holy and just. Our anger often opens the door and leaves us vulnerable to sin.

All of this is not to say that we should not feel anger, but it is to caution us about our anger. One of the questions the Lord often asks when people are angry is “Why are you angry?” He does this with Cain, and He does it with His prophet Jonah when Jonah is angry about the Lord showing compassion to others. The Lord asks him twice, “Is it right for you to be angry?” (Jonah 4:4,9, NIV). The Lord would challenge our feelings of anger for our good.

Biblical Strategies for Managing Your Anger

When it comes to anger, there are several ways to master it and get it under control, so that you don’t allow it to control you. The Bible offers us some strategies to get anger under control, and some of the ways to do this include the following:

Prayer and lament Scripture encourages believers to turn to prayer and lament when faced with anger and other emotions. When we pray, we turn toward God and lay what we’re feeling at His feet; there are many prayers of lament in Scripture in which people express all sorts of emotions toward God. Instead of keeping it in, tell God about it (Psalm 37; Psalm 13; Psalm 73).

Reflect on your anger The Lord posed questions to Cain and Jonah about their anger. Sometimes we need to take a moment to consider why we’re angry, and if we’re right to be angry. Our anger is often provoked because of an affront to our pride; it’s aroused not because of what matters to the Lord, but because we feel threatened when we shouldn’t. Take a moment to consider why you’re angry.

Along with this is what James says about anger; instead of leaning into our anger, he says, “Everyone should be quick to listen, slow to speak and slow to become angry” (James 1:19, NIV). Listening requires putting the other person and their needs first. When we listen and don’t inflame the situation further by what we say, it often provides clarity into the issues at hand.

Forgiveness Forgiveness releases you from the need to get even. It is a powerful antidote to anger when it’s sparked by someone wronging you. Forgiving someone doesn’t mean they’re off the hook, but it does mean unburdening yourself from resentment and anger toward them because of what they did.

Passages such as Matthew 6:14-15, Colossians 3:13, and Ephesians 4:32 highlight the importance of forgiving others as God forgave us, promoting peace and reconciliation in our relationships. Putting these verses into practice means approaching others with empathy, which positions you to resolve conflicts amicably and strengthen your relationships.

Peacemaking One of the many callings upon believers is to be peacemakers. Matthew 5:9 (NIV) says, “Blessed are the peacemakers, for they will be called children of God.” Being a peacemaker involves, among other things, actively seeking resolution and harmony in our relationships instead of harboring anger.

Being wise and gentle Dealing with anger also involves wisdom. When people are on edge and tempers are flaring, don’t add fuel to the fire. “A gentle answer turns away wrath, but a harsh word stirs up anger” (Proverbs 15:1, NIV). Speaking gently instead of with harshness can make a difference, and it requires self-control to do just that (Proverbs 25:28).

There is more that the Bible says about anger and how to deal with it. Anger is a challenging emotion for many people, sometimes because of past experiences with it, especially when that anger was expressed through violence, passive-aggressive behaviors, or harsh words. Being slow to anger in environments such as the workplace or the internet can promote a healthier culture of mutual respect and understanding.

Handling Your Anger Well

Anger is a complex emotion, and it can affect your relationships and personal well-being in profound ways. Instead of denying that your anger exists, it’s important to acknowledge it, reflect on its root causes, and use effective strategies to deal with it in ways that align with the Lord’s will for your life. Anger alerts you that there’s something amiss, and how you respond to that makes all the difference in the world.

Many strategies can help you manage your anger, such as learning how to breathe to calm yourself when anger starts taking over. You can also develop the skill of detecting the signs of anger in yourself and what triggers you. Doing this can help you to prepare yourself for those situations where you could be provoked to anger.

Hope through Help

You can get help to control anger in your life and find healing from unhealthy expressions of anger that you’ve experienced. Reach out to a therapist who can help you understand your anger, how anger may have affected you and your well-being, as well as effective strategies for handling anger. Sow peace into your life by seeking help from a professional to deal with anger. Contact our office today.