It’s been said that if something is important to you, you’ll make time for it. However, it’s also true that we’re often driven by the urgency of “now.” Our lives are driven by the pressing needs of the moment. It’s not that we take what we care about for granted; it’s just that we may not be paying as much attention as we should.
For couples in Vancouver, this pattern can be a form of benign neglect, but it can nonetheless affect the couple and their connectedness. Date night is a great way for a couple to prioritize the relationship. Having a few ideas handy can make it easier to get it done.
Why does date night matter?
How do you feel at the suggestion that you and your partner should consider having a regular date night as part of your rhythms as a couple? Does it feel like an imposition, like it’s just one more thing to add to an already packed schedule? Maybe it feels like a good suggestion, something valuable for nurturing your relationship.
Couples may find it’s a great idea, but struggle to implement it. It may be helpful to start at the beginning, to consider why date night matters in the first place. You might falter when it comes to implementing plans for date night, but you’ll probably not get started if you aren’t convinced it’s a good idea to begin with.
There are a few reasons why date night matters for a couple, regardless the stage of their relationship. A date night is when you and your partner set aside time intentionally to be together, away from your typical responsibilities. One reason for it is it gives you time to nurture your delight in each other – to savor the water from your own springs, to use the turn of phrase from Proverbs 5:15-23.
Date night can help you to maintain your relationship. It can also rekindle a spark that has dimmed. You can only build trust and a sense of connection with someone you spend time with, and date night is one way to do this consistently. You need to be intentional in order to connect. Life is simply too busy to leave to chance opportunities to connect and build intimacy with your significant other.
Date night can provide you with space to truly hear one another. Amid the hustle and bustle of everyday life, you might communicate to ensure that things get done. Coordinating your schedules so that chores are done, and your child gets to their activities is a far cry from hearing your beloved’s heart. You need to set time aside to give each other your undivided attention, hear each other’s thoughts and feelings, and laugh together.
Another reason date night matters is that it can break your routine in a most pleasant way. You get to experience your spouse or partner in a different environment. Perhaps you get to try new things, and those fresh experiences help you discover different facets of each other. Date night can also help in relieving daily and weekly stress that easily accumulates and leads to parental and work burnout.
Date night can help a couple foster gratitude for each other. It’s a way for a couple to demonstrate that they are prioritizing their relationship and its health above other considerations. This can provide a healthy model for their children, as they witness their parents valuing their relationship and investing in it.
Not only that, but it helps the couple to retain their identity away from the work and parenting responsibilities that can easily override their identity as a couple. Dates allow them to build their shared identity as a couple, strengthening their ability to handle challenges that inevitably affect all relationships.
Date night is an intentional investment in your relationship. It signals that prioritization to your children, and to one another. Life gets busy. If you don’t set time aside to continually connect with your significant other, it can set a slow drift between you in motion. All this is to say that date night matters significantly.
Some Ground Rules for Date Night
As you think about date night ideas in Vancouver, WA, there may be a few things to keep in mind.
Consider one another
Do something that you’ll both have a reasonable chance of enjoying. You can also take turns doing things one partner enjoys more than the other but remember that the point is to enjoy it and connect over it. It’s an opportunity to serve each other, and not meet your own needs selfishly.
Be willing to mix it up
There’s a reason we have a favorite restaurant, movie, or even pair of slippers. There’s something comforting about the familiar. If you have one chance per week or month to go out and connect, you probably want to go somewhere. You know the type of experience you’re going to have, and you know what it’ll cost.
Given how pricy a night out can get, you want to have a great experience. Go for what’s familiar, but be willing to explore new and different things, too. Trying something new creates vulnerability and, often, fun. You might discover a whole new side of yourselves, your city, or your relationship.
Be consistent
Do you remember how it was in the beginning of your relationship? You probably couldn’t get enough of each other. Date night is you fighting to keep that alive. If you don’t do something often enough, it doesn’t become a habit. If it’s not a habit, you don’t reap its benefits. If for some reason it doesn’t stick, keep trying.
Be expectant
Date night can stand or fall based on the attitude you bring to it. It’s a good thing to spend time with your spouse. Sometimes you may have some things to work through, and that’s okay. In that case, you can set aside time in the week to catch up and wrestle with issues, before setting a regular date night.
Dig deep
Date night in Vancouver should be fun, but that doesn’t mean it can’t also be deep and meaningful. Choose activities that are tech-free in a way that allows you to focus on each other. You can be creative and explore new places but be attentive to and prioritize having meaningful conversations. It’s about sharing yourselves intentionally and talking about the things that matter to you both.
Some Fun Date Night Ideas in Vancouver, WA
You might like to include outdoorsy, creative, foodie, relaxing, or adventurous activities like the following date night ideas in Vancouver, WA:
- Go on a sunset picnic
- Go stargazing in a secluded spot
- Hike or take a nature walk
- Go rock climbing at the Source Climbing Center
- Take a walk or go for a bike ride
- Visit a local park or beach
- Rent a kayak or stand-up paddleboard from Sweetwater SUP Rentals
- Enjoy an outdoor movie night
- Take a cooking class
- Take a dance class
- Go for dinner at a new restaurant
- Reserve a wine tasting at the Maryhill Winery in Vancouver
- Take a painting or pottery class
- Attend a concert or live music event
- Go to the theater or to a comedy show
- Do an escape room challenge at ParadigmQ or
- Go for mini golf or visit the X Golf Indoor Simulator in Vancouver
- Go bowling at Big Al’s Vancouver
- Go on a scavenger hunt
- Do a couples massage, or have a spa night, or a hot tub and sauna experience
- Visit a vintage car show
- Go to a free museum or gallery night
- Do a game night at home, or go to a board game café
Whatever you choose, the most important thing is to do an activity you both enjoy and that will allow you to have quality time together. Date nights are an investment in your relationship. They can help you by nurturing love, a sense of connection, and growth in your relationship.
Christian Couples Counseling in Vancouver, WA
If you’re struggling with connection, date night ideas in Vancouver, WA might change that, However, sometimes there are deeper issues that need to be unpacked for your relationship to flourish. Individual or couples counseling in Vancouver might be what’s needed. Sometimes the biggest gift to your relationship is working on the well-worn patterns that you have long held within you.
If you could benefit from some relationship help, contact us today at Vancouver Christian Counseling in Washington. We can make an appointment for you with a therapist in Vancouver. Your counselor in Vancouver, Washington will help you with establishing healthy communication, working through unresolved conflict, finding healing and forgiveness, and building intimacy.
“Happy Family”, Courtesy of Getty Images, Unsplash.com, Unsplash+ License; “Sitting on the Bridge”, Courtesy of Daniel J. Schwarz, Unsplash.com, CC0 License; “Reading Together”, Courtesy of Cassidy Rowell, Unsplash.com, CC0 License; “Picnic on the Dunes”, Courtesy of Tiziano Maset, Unsplash.com, CC0 License